Yikes. That's 22 year old me right there.
4 years seems like centuries. Really. No one that I regularly see now, except my family and my friend Allison, knew me when this picture was taken.
Sometimes I think about my past and say, "Ugh. I was such a mess...I'm totally together now. I have it all figured out."
I've stopped fooling myself.
I was talking to one of my dearest gal pals last week about growing up. About looking around at laundry and cooking and groceries and bills and jobs and...reality...
Sometimes reality smacks you in the face. Sometimes it sneaks in slowly...
It's a hard place in life that not everyone gets to. Some people always know they're going to be domestic, 9 to 5ers who go to PTA meetings and never live too far away from mom and dad.
Some people move off to New York City, or L.A. to see their dreams come true.
And then there's those of us who thought we'd be rock stars, or at least work for them.
We come to a crossroads: bitterness or settling.
OR...we can chill out and appreciate what's good in our lives. We can find someone to go on the journey with us. We can find our place.
Maybe that place is closer to home than we thought it would be.
I don't have to give up who I am, or the person I thought I'd be, just because my life didn't take the direction I thought it would.
Growing up, getting "domestic" as I say, doesn't mean giving up everything that's good for a bunch of bad, lame, boring stuff.
But that's a hard realization to come to...it's a rough patch a lot of people go through.
Here are some things that make me happy about being here in Missouri:
My new job that I really like and I know will challenge me for a LONG time
Saturday bike rides with my dad
Karaoke
Mexican Villa
Cardinals games in the summer
Jasmine, Shannon, Sabra, and Hannah
My little brother
Lunches with my mom...
Lots of Love,
Carrie Anne
4 years seems like centuries. Really. No one that I regularly see now, except my family and my friend Allison, knew me when this picture was taken.
Sometimes I think about my past and say, "Ugh. I was such a mess...I'm totally together now. I have it all figured out."
I've stopped fooling myself.
I was talking to one of my dearest gal pals last week about growing up. About looking around at laundry and cooking and groceries and bills and jobs and...reality...
Sometimes reality smacks you in the face. Sometimes it sneaks in slowly...
It's a hard place in life that not everyone gets to. Some people always know they're going to be domestic, 9 to 5ers who go to PTA meetings and never live too far away from mom and dad.
Some people move off to New York City, or L.A. to see their dreams come true.
And then there's those of us who thought we'd be rock stars, or at least work for them.
We come to a crossroads: bitterness or settling.
OR...we can chill out and appreciate what's good in our lives. We can find someone to go on the journey with us. We can find our place.
Maybe that place is closer to home than we thought it would be.
I don't have to give up who I am, or the person I thought I'd be, just because my life didn't take the direction I thought it would.
Growing up, getting "domestic" as I say, doesn't mean giving up everything that's good for a bunch of bad, lame, boring stuff.
But that's a hard realization to come to...it's a rough patch a lot of people go through.
Here are some things that make me happy about being here in Missouri:
My new job that I really like and I know will challenge me for a LONG time
Saturday bike rides with my dad
Karaoke
Mexican Villa
Cardinals games in the summer
Jasmine, Shannon, Sabra, and Hannah
My TV family
Cheap rentMy little brother
Lunches with my mom...
Lots of Love,Carrie Anne
Reading this was like being in my own brain! I was thinking the other day about how ordinary and boring my life seems--not on a day-to-day basis, but as a whole (I'm a reference librarian, I'm married, I live forty minutes from where I grew up...) and when I was a kid I never thought my grown-up life would be like that. But I've started to reconsider what I consider "the good life" to be, and I realize that this is it for me, for now. Of course, you never know what will happen, but at this point in time I feel like I'm in the right place and I think that's what counts. I'm glad that you are happy with so much in your life too, Carrie! Thanks for making me think!
ReplyDeleteOh yes, I remember around the time when that picture was taken :)
ReplyDeleteYeah, I've been thinking recently about how "old" and ordinary I feel. Married, and I totally beat Heather by living less than two miles from the house I grew up and less than a mile from my high school. Then there is the fact I find cooking fun...
But in the end, I'm very happy with things the way they are and I'm just being me.
Good thoughts, girls :)